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Thursday, March 22, 2012

"Housing run-aways"

First off I have to thank one Mother that called me in regards to our run-away teenager. Secondly I'm tired of being silent about this issue that is so bizarre to me. "Housing run-aways" Our family dynamics with different special needs and attachment issues will likely heighten our percentage for teen run-aways. What I don't understand is why parents will house teenagers that aren't their own without consulting or investigating why a teenager deems themselves "homeless?" We're in a society that 99% of the cases there is a home and if not, there is the Ministry of Children and families. So why on earth would a random parent house, feed, clothe and take responsibilities of a youth that isn't theirs? Unfortunately if the answer is because the teen was cold, starving and complaining about their current living conditions, it doesn't hold ground with me. I as a responsible parent would contact their legal guardian. We should all know that teenagers are seeking their independence in one form or another, (and if you're not experienced with that) consult someone that can lead you in the right direction. Do not house a child that isn't yours. It's enabling and should be considered against the law. Our teenager is a complete manipulator, therefore opening your door will only cause you grief. You have no idea the past history, any current physical and mental conditions. It's just so mind boggling to me knowing that parents allow someone they do not know into their home. Perhaps it could be a risk to you!? Any how, our teen run-away has been enabled for quite sometime because people believe they should help but in fact they created the opposite. Also without knowing the facts, (contacting me) please do not assume we haven't done everything possible to help our child. I will invite you over for coffee and pleasantly give you an enlightenment. I decided to write about this topic because it's just unbelievable on how many run-away teenagers are enabled to keep running because of individuals claiming they're helping "the teens" situation. There is teenagers everywhere manipulating people and I'm sorry, there should be a consequence for the parents housing children that aren't theirs. That might correct the problem and have less teenagers on the street. I walked by a young teen, dressed wearing a hoody, DC shoes and a clean baseball cap just the other day asking for money because he's apparently homeless. I told him to go home or contact the Ministry. One great attribute our Country has is foster care. No child is homeless unless they choose to be. I do understand there is certain scenarios that warrant children to run but again, investigate it before opening yourself up to manipulation and a responsibility you will regret. So I'm speaking out for all the families that have run-away teenagers and I want to say, "You're not alone and I understand your frustrations when your child is enabled to run" "It's not your fault and us parents need some recognition that we've done the best we could" I'm no longer silent. If my dear teenager is reading this, you know the truths sweetheart. You know what you need to do and you're not homeless. Homeless people are the poor individuals that come from circumstances that have left them on the street, like above. They have no supports. Teenagers have supports, our children definitely have supports. So whoever you are, perhaps you're a parent that has housed or are housing a run-away, my only advice is to do your homework.

1 comment:

  1. Excellent posting, Carrie! I agree with you completely, and just can't understand why another parent would even let the "homeless" child in for anything other than a phone call to their parent. Unfortunately, this is all too often of an occurrence, as bizarre as it is to take in another person's chid, without the parent's knowledge and/or consent. I think that you are right~ charges should be laid~perhaps for abetting a minor. It's my experience that the "helping" adult usually comes to their senses, after the honeymoon period, and then end up knocking on my door. I've actually had situations where these adults thought I should thank them for 'all they've done' for my child. Anyways, I really enjoyed your posting~ it feels great to know that someone else "gets it".