Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Bright lights

We don't have the aftermath like an earthquake would cause but being Wednesday we're back on track. I will admit all the talk about Cuba with my sister who travels at least twice a year makes me want a plane ticket. That's also not my reality. Although I'm taking 4-5 of our children to Malcolm Island. It's located off of Port McNeil. We'll be there for three days! In the meantime with our rain settling in, I'm back to baking and cooking in my nooked kitchen. Therapeutic Horse riding starts today for two of our girls for the next eleven weeks. Recently our oldest son told me I'm "intense" in regards to my children. I'm thinking he meant by our child numbers but while I think about this comment, to me it means "too involved" I wonder if he has a point? After all, I've written previous posts on a "Happy self" Perhaps I do get caught up with too many feelings inside but my question is, "How do I not?" I openly speak about everything within the support groups that I attend, I write and I acknowledge that I am "intense" So "Thank you son, I know" Our oldest son went through two years of searching for his independence, he still is and honestly because I know he's reading; I do understand. It's just that I am "too intense" wanting everything and anything to be great for him, I love him like I love all our children. Sometimes my feelings get in the way on how to support while our teenagers transition from being a child into being a young adult. It seems that the only way to move out is to move like an earthquake. Eventually everything settles and all the pieces are being picked up, one by one - a little step at a time. In the grand scheme of either days, months and possible years later, there is the brighter side. Like today, it might not be bright outside but inside our home it's calm. I've been explaining to anyone affected by any episode that creating more drama doesn't help any situation. Like myself, it's perfectly healthy to go through all the emotions but we all need to move on and understand that we all need to go through the process of feelings. We all deal with feelings differently and having the respect for one another, we have to give each other time. As a parent, I always remind our children that I am a person with feelings too. In fact I think most children/teens forget we're human beings with an organ called a heart controlled by our brain! It's interesting their response, usually its a pause while they think about me having feelings......then it's, "Sorry Mom" That's the bright light I'm talking about! One day I will write a book but for now, sharing my life through this blog is ideal. My belief it helps me (I love writing) and I always hope it helps you in one way or another. One fact I know for sure; we're not alone as parents. Before I cared about what others thought, today not so much. The only thing I care about is our bright lights and hearing about others!

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