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Sunday, April 14, 2013

Pay it forward

A pay it forward story. Our oldest sons' girlfriend, her sister and her mother attend these monthly gatherings. A pay it forward group. Where everyone attending puts in $5.00 into the pot. At the end of the evening, everyone picks out a rock. The one that gets the rock with a red dot, gets the money in the pot. Then they have to spend that money on someone else. Someone in need. They picked our daughter, her boyfriend and their baby to purchase everything seen above. I was very touched. Touched enough, and love the idea so much that I've joined the group.

I've been besides myself with gratitude. Before this lovely family came by (seen above) I had a friend stop in dropping off squares, books and sentimental items that I really was in "awe" over. Before that my Father and Mother stopped in meeting their great grand baby. It was a busy day of endless support.

Then I heard from my oldest daughter that is currently traveling Central America. I was hiking up Notch hill when she messaged me. She was looking at Mexican homemade baby slippers. She was acknowledging her younger sister and mentioning she's an Auntie. I was shocked. I've been letting our family and friends absorb our new enlightenment's at their own pace in hopes we can move on peacefully. When I realized my oldest daughter has accepted her sister back into our lives, it was not only relieving but once again, I felt a sense of peace within me. I remember when the three of us, (myself and my two oldest daughters) would lie on my bed watching Grey's Anatomy eating popcorn together. Everything lately has been bringing tears to my eyes.

When you adopt, everything changes. You loose friends, you gain friends, your family dynamics change. It's not an easy path. It's not easy for anyone especially all the children involved. I'm speaking from my own heart and experiences but what I've seen through our challenges, -  it's definitely challenging but there is a light. My children have shown me that. I'm a proud mom today. I'm a very appreciative mom and in "awe" for all the support, and thoughtfulness. This is the way the world needs to move - forgiving, and paying it forward everyday.

At the top of Notch hill today I revisited the little grave. I carried up different rocks, shells and one of our sons wanted to place a little heart he made. He said to me, "I hope it's still there when we come up again" Another "awe" moment to end this weekend. My son just then showed his respect. I have great challenging children. The lights at the end of the day keeps my heart pumping.

We all should be paying it forward - what can you do for someone today?

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