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Friday, March 21, 2014

"May the sun shine down on you"

Lots of illnesses circulating our home this spring break. It has forced us to cancel plans. Life is always unpredictable and sometimes not pleasurable. All week I've been really sick with a fever, body aches, a sore throat (like swallowing burning little blades constantly) a massive head cold where I can't breathe, and the wet coughing started. It seems to be a virus covering absolutely everything. One of the worst sicknesses I've had. Headaches, teeth aching, ears throbbing, skin crawling, you name it - it comes with this horrible virus. On day four my husband brought home a slurpee for me, the cold ice was the only soother. It made my day like heaven. I've been sucking on halls night and day without great results but the ice is now my saviour! I'm a sight for sore eyes. My nose was already swollen from being previously burnt my week away. I had heat stroke with skin swelling for days. Now I've been blowing it like there's a party happening somewhere but here! A laugh on me....I'm not sure if you've ever slept with halls in your mouth. I have been. Popping endless halls in my mouth throughout my nights this week. Around 3am I awoke with my nose running, I could hardly breathe, my throat felt raw and my halls that I fell asleep sucking on was stuck on my eyebrow! Without thought, I peeled the dried hall off my eyebrow hairs that I do have and stuck it back in my mouth while blowing my nose and falling back to sleep in the multiple used tissues all over my pillow. By Friday morning I continued to blow my worn out nose and I cried in my tissue. Multiple usage tissue; blowing my nose and wiping tears at the same time. It no longer mattered to me if I developed pink eye too! I started to feel sorry for myself, feeling angered with the wasted week, feeling sorry for my family because all our plans have been canceled. That spring break sucks! Even worse, it's beautiful outside. It's the weather I was wishing for so we could do so many fun outdoor activities. A week wasted. Then my cousin called. This summer we were going to stop and visit him during our travels up north. He explained he has bladder cancer. After removing most of the cancer with a recent surgery, he found out that it has spread and he now has to start chemo, fighting to live. Like many similar stories, we just never know what can plague us, and change our lives forever. It reminded me that my problems this week is nothing. I know so many individuals struggling to survive. I know people that survived their life threatening struggles that warrants so much praise, a listening ear and an compassionate heart. After my cry, I continued to blow my nose, suck on my slurpee to soothe my need but I no longer felt like my week was wasted and that my family suffered because we didn't get to go hiking somewhere. I felt blessed. Besides being sick with whatever this is, (so far) our family of 20 is healthy with no major life threatening diseases. My children have played outside on a daily basis, my youngest daughter remains happy regardless of her limited physical abilities and the sun is shining on our family, and over our home. I'm not sure what tomorrow brings, but for now regardless on how I feel physically, mentally I feel on top of our world. For my cousin, I will only believe in the positives, in his strength and for what's meant to be. He's on our list of people to see this summer, including a birth grandpa that just had two strokes who I also recently talked too on the phone. I have absolutely nothing to complain about, this too shall pass and I hope to only embrace within myself what matters, that's everyone I care for, the life and strength within us and the compassion for the ones that need it. May the sun shine down on you - me.

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